The Beauty that Comes from Pain...
I've been weepy lately. I've been described over the years as the Ice Princess just to give you perspective. ;) I'm pretty matter of fact and a thinker and not so much on the feeling parts of life. But I will say that the older I get the more I feel the tears come easy. I'm not worried as much anymore about what people think of my crying - age does that, gives you the ownness to say "Who gives a flip what people think?!" What brings the tears can be varied, but the commonality seems to be some form of pain. What you do with the pain matters - it matters how you accept it and it matters how you process it too.
Pain comes in so many ways, especially with all of the social media and news access today that was not even dreamt of when I was a girl. I wake up and look at CNN and read about a million different hurting people. I check social media and see a dear momma dying of cancer, strong and brave and 38 years old with a loving husband and four beautiful small children. I see my husband's precious parents giving up their retirement to raise their grandchildren. I have friends going through deep struggles to make sense of events in their lives. And then my kids - they're sensing this shaky season of their parents' lives and asking to go "Back to our old house to live." I hear my mom choosing to be strong while my dad's heart tries it's best to stay in rhythm. Pain is just all around us and no matter how old you may be you have to process the pain or stuff the pain. I've done both. Process is not my favorite, but the stuffing - it will eventually force process.
Recently when a hard topic, hard situation, hard thing we hear about with a friend comes up the Lawman and I will look at each other and say, "Buy a farm, build a house, get some animals...." and then we laugh. It's how we communicate Hope to each other. Back to the ancient, more simple ways. Not to be confused with easy because allowing yourself to live in your skin is painful. :)
But I've noticed something about pain...it's the precursor to Life. It's been a part of the story since the beginning...pain always comes before the living. Ask any mom who has given birth to a baby ~ pain is the checkered flag waving and saying "Look! Life is on the way!!!"
So next week the Lawman and I are making a trek to Tennessee to look for that farm we talk about. I am excited and terrified too. We absolutely love our city, our community our old home; but something in us is inviting us to this next season. We long to create space for weary people to find rest, to be known, safe and to have the freedom to think about the Bride outside of the four walls. But it is painful...and we're in the middle of laboring. I've had six children and I know what's coming, more pain. Worse pain. But I also know that He's near and He didn't promise that it would be easy, but that He would be close. He would be WITH us.
If you think about it next Thursday-Sunday, would you pray for us as we look at places in Tennessee? Would you let us know how to pray for you as you breathe through the contractions of life? We'll encourage each other to be brave like my sweet little sister Rachel does for me as my babies begin their entry into the world. And then we'll rejoice as Life breaks into the pain and the sweet smell of another picture of Him is revealed!
Pain comes in so many ways, especially with all of the social media and news access today that was not even dreamt of when I was a girl. I wake up and look at CNN and read about a million different hurting people. I check social media and see a dear momma dying of cancer, strong and brave and 38 years old with a loving husband and four beautiful small children. I see my husband's precious parents giving up their retirement to raise their grandchildren. I have friends going through deep struggles to make sense of events in their lives. And then my kids - they're sensing this shaky season of their parents' lives and asking to go "Back to our old house to live." I hear my mom choosing to be strong while my dad's heart tries it's best to stay in rhythm. Pain is just all around us and no matter how old you may be you have to process the pain or stuff the pain. I've done both. Process is not my favorite, but the stuffing - it will eventually force process.
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| The view from the farmhouse |
Recently when a hard topic, hard situation, hard thing we hear about with a friend comes up the Lawman and I will look at each other and say, "Buy a farm, build a house, get some animals...." and then we laugh. It's how we communicate Hope to each other. Back to the ancient, more simple ways. Not to be confused with easy because allowing yourself to live in your skin is painful. :)
But I've noticed something about pain...it's the precursor to Life. It's been a part of the story since the beginning...pain always comes before the living. Ask any mom who has given birth to a baby ~ pain is the checkered flag waving and saying "Look! Life is on the way!!!"
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| Farm house we'll visit next week |
If you think about it next Thursday-Sunday, would you pray for us as we look at places in Tennessee? Would you let us know how to pray for you as you breathe through the contractions of life? We'll encourage each other to be brave like my sweet little sister Rachel does for me as my babies begin their entry into the world. And then we'll rejoice as Life breaks into the pain and the sweet smell of another picture of Him is revealed!
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